Kim Kardashian’s Old Navy Lookalike to Play Snooki in ‘Jersey Shore’ Spoof

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Here's yet another sign that the end of days will come in 2012 - Kim Kardashian's lookalike from that infamous Old Navy ad is going to play Snooki in a SyFy movie.

Bubbly brunette beauty Melissa Molinaro is the reason that Kim is suing Old Navy's parent company The Gap. Kim believes that the The Gap has ruined her reputation by using a girl that looks like her in its "Super C-U-T-E" ad, but company contends that the reality show star is the only one making herself look bad. It's a ridiculous situation that just keeps getting weirder.

For one thing, Melissa is dating Kim's ex Reggie Bush. Of course this probably had nothing to do with why wannabe Elizabeth Taylor got so upset about her lookalike getting so much attention. But Melissa just calls the whole situation "silly" and is putting it behind her by proving that she can morph into other celebrities.

She's about to transform into the pint-sized Princess of Poughkeepsie for a new SyFy movie, so Snooks might want to keep an eye on Jionni - after all, Melissa was such a convincing Kim knockoff that she managed to snag her man. Who's to say the same thing won't happen with Mama Meatball's beefcake?

SyFy is also trying to make sure that it doesn't get sued by MTV by changing the name of Melissa's character to "Nooki," but since Fred Durst doesn't seem to have much going on these days, the network still better be careful (yes, we know that the Limp Bizkit song title had an "e" in it, but desperate times call for desperate lawsuits).

Melissa told Fox News that Nooki will rock Snooks' iconic poof, orange skin, leopard print spandex, and acrylic nails, so there will be no mistaking who she is supposed to be in "Jersey Shore Shark Attack."

That's right - SyFy is doing yet another low-budget shark movie, and it's safe to say that audiences will be rooting for the shark in this one. Hopefully the man-eater likes salt and vinegar - if Nooki is a pickle-lover like Snooks, all that tanning and brine will make her taste like a giant potato chip. The poor shark also isn't going to get much of a meal since she's 75 percent hair extensions and eye makeup.

It will be lucky if it survives for long feasting on "Jersey Shore" parodies - the shark could choke on a hair extension or get sick after swallowing too many breast implants. But at least its diet could make for an epic "Jaws"-style ending - once it's consumed enough hairspray, all a heroic guido will have to do is throw a flaming meatball in its mouth.

So will you watch Kim's lookalike in "Jersey Shore Shark Attack," or has SyFy finally produced a horror movie that's just too scary to check out?

More From This Contributor:

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