‘American Idol’ Recap: It’s Barely Rock ‘N Roll for the Top 7

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‘American Idol’ Recap: It’s Barely Rock ‘N Roll for the Top 7
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Mariah Carey

Wednesday night's "American Idol" had a new theme: Classic Rock, No Ballads. The result: Exactly no one rocked out, and one even sang a ballad.

Judges Keith Urban, Nicki Minaj, Randy Jackson and Mariah Carey worked with what they had -- which wasn't much -- as the Top 7 contestants tackled Billy Joel and Queen songs. But the performances were so lackluster -- and for some, so uncomfortable -- that Rock Week was this season's weakest offering yet. Guest guitarist Orianthi was the only star of this show.

Which Boy Will Go Home This Week?

The judges have already stacked the deck in the girls' favor this season, and the Classic Rock theme hurt the two boys remaining, so expect one of them to go home tonight. Burnell Taylor sang an uncomfortably karaoke version of the Bon Jovi classic "You Give Love a Bad Name," causing Keith to quip, "I'm going to assume rock is not your thing." Burnell admitted he's not a rocker (ya think?), but he did try, bless his heart, and his sad puppy performance prompted Nicki to talk about how she wanted to cuddle, squeeze, and eat him.

Lazaro Arbos channeled Freddie Mercury twice in one night, but unfortunately, he forgot the lyrics during his "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" duet with Angie Miller. Here's the crazy little thing about song lyrics: You're supposed to memorize them. This makes two weeks in a row that the former ice cream scooper spaced out on the words to his performance songs. He fared better on his solo performance of "We Are The Champions," but he seemed to forget the "no ballads" rule this week.

Girls Rule

Although none of the five remaining girls are rocker chicks, they definitely ruled on Rock Night. (Having Orianthi in the house didn't hurt their girl power, either.)

Kree Harrison sang Janis Joplin's "Piece of my Heart," and there's no question that she sang it well. Trouble was, it sounded like a Janis Joplin song. While Nicki declared she'd give Kreedom all 50 of her votes if she could (don't worry, her Barbz surely got the subliminal message), the "Idol" contestant didn't make the song her own. Still, it was one of the few solid performances of the night. Fun fact: Kree was born in the same Texas hospital as Janis Joplin. (So that explains it!)

Janelle Arthur may have been right to sing Billy Joel's "You May be Right." The bubbly blonde smiled her way through her performance, making the song a little bit country, a little bit rock and roll.

Candice Glover covered "I Can't Get No Satisfaction" by The Rolling Stones, and she seemed to satisfy three of the judges. Unfortunately, Nicki told her that while her voice is amazing, she "fell asleep with that song."

Standing O time. Amber Holcomb belted out Heart's "What About Love." And the judges loved it, with Randy saying, "What I love is you didn't lose Amber in there ... I can still hear the little Houston-isms in there, the Whitney-isms."

And Angie Miller hopped behind her piano for a millisecond to play the opening to "Bring Me to Life" by Evanescence, then she rocked out in front of a wind machine. But the performance really punctuated the fact that she's not a rocker. The judges liked it, though, because they had to. It's a girls' season, in case you didn't know.

"American Idol" airs on Wednesdays and Thursdays at 8/7c on FOX.

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