Kim Zolciak’s Pre-Birth Photo Is Priceless

Speechless? Amused? Horrified? Check, check and check.

If you've never seen Bravo's "Real Housewives of Atlanta," you might be asking yourself, "Who are these people? Is Heidi Montag pregnant?!" No, that is not Heidi Montag (but good guess!). That is Kim Zolciak: be-wigged star of "RHOA," archnemesis of NeNe Leakes and chanteuse of the one-hit wonder "Tardy For the Party." Zolciak, who's expecting a child with Atlanta Falcons player Kroy Biermann in just a few weeks, has been exploiting the pregnancy in the glossy pages of Life & Style. This latest photo collaboration (pictured) is clearly the result of Zolciak's artistic vision, and her acutely anguished expression suggests divergent perspectives: is she basking in the bliss of her Bump? Or, is she on the verge of tears, wondering whatever happened to her love with married mystery man Big Poppa? Will Biermann ever truly repair the giant rupture in Zolciak's heart ripped open by Big Poppa and NeNe, the former soulmates who betrayed her?

Like all great works of art, the experience is subjective.