How Will Celebrities Spend Armageddon?

The Famous: Watching the Watched

Have you heard? The End of the World is upon us! It's supposedly going down on Saturday, and we're going to spend it curled up with a blanket, a carton of seven-layer taco dip from Trader Joe's and a DVRed episode of "Real Housewives" because if heaven is a place on earth, then it must be on our couch.

But enough about us. Let's worry about the celebrities for a change: What do A-listers, pop tarts and tabloid targets have planned for the impending Apocalypse? Probably something more fun and liberating as they break free from the shackles of the PR machine to really let loose, since the world is ending and all. Here are some of our predictions:

--Britney will escape her security detail, rent a car and embark on a cross-country road trip with LiLo, Xtina and other members of the Bad Girls' Club.

--Melania Trump will turn into a zombie, and shave The Donald's head.

--Justin Bieber will hold a press conference, peel off his skin and reveal himself to be Frankie Muniz. "I could always sing, but nobody wanted to listen," he'll say, tossing the mask across the room. "I just needed a new face. Do you still love me?"

--Maria Shriver will give one major TV interview to discuss Arnold's baby mama drama. The interview will happen in Oprah's tricked-out bomb shelter.

--Charlie Sheen will finally issue a public apology to all the women he has maligned and terrorized. He'll then grab a gallon of Tiger Blood and stand on the roof of his Sober Valley Lodge like Andy Dufresne busting out of Shawshank, bellowing, "TAKE ME JESUS!"

So many possibilities, so little time.