"Bend It Like Beckham" star Keira Knightley finds herself bent over the knee of psychoanalyst Carl Jung in her new movie "A Dangerous Method." The blonde beauty plays the role of Sabina Spielrein, a patient who has a kinky S&M affair with Michael Fassbender's Carl Jung. And who's playing the good Dr. Sigmund Freud in the midst of all this? That would be Viggo Mortensen, who manages to hide his innate hunkiness behind Freud's goatee and buttoned-up waistcoat.
Knightley says she almost didn't take the part due to concerns about the sexual nature of certain scenes, spanking included. The "Pirates" lovely was swayed by director David Cronenberg's assurances that the spanking scene would be clinical instead of sexy. We're having a hard time imagining what a clinical spanking looks looks like, so we'll have to wait and see.
As for big-screen spankings, Knightley's in good company. Here are several stars who have participated in on-screen spankings.
The venerable John Wayne spanked a woman not once, but twice, in the course of his many movies. In the 1963 flick "Donovan's Reef," Wayne turned Elizabeth Allen over his knee for a little spanky-panky near the edge of a fountain. Wayne's more famous spanking scene featured The Duke applying a small coal shovel to the derriere of luscious redhead Maureen O'Hara in "McLintock."
While we're sure there are more than a few men who wouldn't mind warming Kiera's cherubic cheeks, we had to look long and, um, hard, to find a man who might inspire the same behind-baring fervor among women. Ladies, how about Elvis? Young Elvis. Uh-huh, we thought so. In the 1961 movie "Blue Hawaii," Elvis Presley showered Jenny Maxwell with his own "Kentucky Rain" of well-meaning spanks. How many? Fourteen. We counted.
They had to sleep in separate, single beds to please the 1950s censors, but serial-spanker Desi Arnaz tuned Lucille Ball bottoms-up twice during the run of the "I Love Lucy" show. Censors, you've got some 'splainin' to do!
And, lest we be accused of sexism, "Kill Bill" star Uma Thurman had things well in hand when she offed about a bajillion Yakuza, then administered a few morale-boosting spanks to the booty of one young survivor. Hey, at least she used the flat of blade.
And who gets our vote for "Hottest Cinema Spanking?" That would have to be Maggie Gyllenhaal in "The Secretary." YouTube. Nuff said.
Did we miss any? Let us know in the comment section.
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- Sigmund Freud
- Michael Fassbender
- David Cronenberg
- Elvis Presley