Carey Mulligan and Leo DiCaprio (Warner Bros)
As The Great Gatsby" rolls into theaters, the Internet has decided that lots of you want to throw decadent parties in the style of main character Jay Gatsby (played by Leonardo DiCaprio in Baz Luhrmann's new incarnation) to mark the occasion.
Oh, and the Internet has also decided you have no idea how to host a true Gatsby party, and are therefore an embarrassment.
"It's like throwing a Lolita-themed children's birthday party," writes the Atlantic Wire, condemning any Gatsby bash as a celebration of the very excess the novel condemns.
Others are less biting, like our friends at BuzzFeed, who recommend serving festive hors d'oeuvres, inviting casual company, and then ultimately canceling because a true Gatsby party doesn't end until "at least two people are dead [and] everyone is disillusioned with the jazz age as a whole." Can you feel us clamoring to RSVP?
One can still find a decent gin fizz recipe and dress code tips, but we at omg! feel the connection with the Roaring Twenties is shifting into a Halloween shop caricature. If you want true decadence, look no further than Luhrmann's cast of stars. Here's how we recommend ringing in Gatsby according to its very modern leads.
Leonardo DiCaprio (Splash News)
Gatsby did nothing small-scale, but let's be honest, the man never knew central heat and air conditioning.
Leonardo DiCaprio (Splash News)
True luxury might look something like DiCaprio at play. Rented yachts with topless bathing beauties, strolls through Italian marketplaces, and the ultimate luxury: being such a boss you can rock your tube socks without criticism.
To celebrate like Leo, head to your nearest beach bar with five male pals, spring for lobster tail, and hit on the hottest lady in the bar. All while wearing your shower sandals.
The Ironclad Exclusivity of a Carey Mulligan Rager
Don't let that prim English accent and high-brow acting fool you. Mulligan knows how to get down. It's just that she does it in some of the loftiest social circles around. Since her marriage to Mumford & Sons rocker Marcus, the only real Mulligan sighting of late has been at the Met Gala.
Carey Mulligan (Getty Images)
In order to wild out like Mulligan, distract yourself from your lady pals, send an ominous note arranging drinks at your nearby supper club or upscale lounge, put your freakum dress on and look bored. Damn, you're popular.
Rule the Parental Roost Like Tobey
You'd be hard pressed to find Tobey Maguire making social runs that don't include a school drop-off or the occasional awards ceremony … but don't think the parenting lane isn't fiercely competitive.
Maguire and wife Jen Meyer support a number of high-profile charities like Stuart House, and leave their little ones under supervision so they can toast the business ventures of pals like Tracy Anderson and her star-studded clientele.
To steal suburban thunder like Maguire, hire the most coveted babysitter on the cul-de-sac, rally your couples friends, and head out on a sexy date night: dinner followed by a “Gatsby” showing.
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